


11:11

by Lady_of_Inklings



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Artist Katsuki Yuuri, Artist Victor Nikiforov, Established Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov, Falling In Love, Flashbacks, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Insomnia, Kissing, Lots of kissing, Love at First Sight, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Mentions of art and painting, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, References to Depression, Reunions, Selkies, Sexual Content, Small Towns, These two really missed each other, Walks On The Beach
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-17
Updated: 2019-02-17
Packaged: 2019-10-30 01:50:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17819543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_of_Inklings/pseuds/Lady_of_Inklings
Summary: 11:11.It was time to make a wish.Viktor could have wished for a million things but he didn't. He didn't wish for fame or money or glory, he only wished for one thing but the sea had what he wanted---what he needed.somewhere beyond that hazy horizon, deep in the sea and far from his reach---Yuuri was there, waiting andlost.





	11:11

**Author's Note:**

> enjoy

No matter how much he tries, Viktor can't sleep. Or rather his mind will not allow him to dream even if his body begs him to rest.

The waves break upon the shore just outside his window, providing a strange lullaby for an insomniac.

He toys briefly with the idea of getting out of bed. It would be a perfect excuse to tire himself out with a run along the beach but his companion was fast asleep at the foot of the bed, snoring lightly and lost in her dreams. He envied her for being able to sleep when he felt so desperate. It's too cold for a swim and getting out of bed would mean trekking across the cold floors. He shivers and draws the quilt closer to him. The bed is too big and too empty. The only source of warmth is the heater in the corner of his room and Makkachin who is too old to take out in this type of weather.

Winter fell upon this town quietly with little fanfare, coating the land in endless snow and ice, leaving him with a sense of melancholy every time he gazed out along the coast. The wind didn't blow as hard as usual, quiet for tonight and mercifully leaving the shudders of his house alone. Yuri has told him to nail down the shudders on his last visit and Viktor only nodded, forgetting about the suggestion until Yuri left and the wind picked up once again.

He huffed, annoyed by his own insomnia, and turned on his side to face the window. Moonlight streaked through the curtains and touched the floor. Through the sheer curtain's, he could see the moon itself and the soft lights of the harbour now no longer obscured by clouds.

His eyes were drawn automatically to the sea, to the horizon where the sun would peak.

Viktor scoffed at the window and turned on his side again, this time facing Yuuri's side of the bed. It didn't help lift his spirits or clear his head. He could still smell his scent, and if he closed his eyes, Viktor could imagine that Yuuri was still here running his fingers through his hair and humming a familiar lullaby.

 _'He'd call me silly....... and then he would kiss my bald spot,_ ' he thought, a little more bitterly that usual. _'Of all the people I could've fallen for, I had to fall in love with him."_

He looked at his alarm clock.

11:11.

It was time to make a wish. He closed his eyes again.

This was his little ritual. His therapist said it was a coping mechanism.....and maybe she was right. It didn't matter now, the last time he saw her was on Wednesday and he dreaded his next session. His mother had done the same whenever he was sick in bed, smiling up at the clock and wishing him to feel better. He didn't know if it worked but it was better to have something to hold onto no matter how futile it felt. Viktor had done this when he was a debt-ridden art student and again when he was at the height of his fame when his inspiration spiralled into nothingness, now he did this whenever he could, desperately hoping for some sort of miracle.

Viktor could have wished for a million things but he didn't. He didn't wish for fame or money or glory, he only wished for one thing but the sea had what he wanted---what he needed.

He opened his eyes and stared at the wall.

Behind him, somewhere beyond that hazy horizon, deep in the sea and far from his reach---Yuuri was there, waiting and lost.

His heart never felt right when Yuuri stepped into the ocean, he could still remember that last soft smile he gave Viktor before the waves swallowed him whole. It was meant to be reassuring but he couldn't shake off the feeling of his final it felt.

To love a selkie was to love the rain, they came and went as they pleased. He often thought Yuuri was selfish, to love him so thoroughly and just leave but as he waited, Viktor realized what a fool he had been. The legends had a grain of truth to them, loving somebody from the sea wasn't simple and Viktor had to learn that lesson the hard way.

Thinking about Yuuri only made his heart ache more.

Viktor closed his eyes for the final time, focusing on the memory of soft brown eyes and the sound of the sea as it touched his feet. He hoped that his dreams would be empty.

He slept eventually, lulled by the sound of Makkachin breathing and the loll of the waves.

 

 

Yuuri Katsuki was like no one he had ever met and Viktor had met many, many people across the span of his short career. They had met at a New Year's Party. Viktor didn't know whose party it was or why he was even here, all he cared about was the man who was dancing with him.

The man was mysterious, stealing his heart away with drunken giggles and dark shimmering eyes that held secrets like the sea. Viktor felt like his world had shattered and from the glassy remains of his prison, his whole existence was reborn into something bright and new. Yuuri's touch was like a spark of fire that raged through his soul and set his own heart on fire.

Desire? Infatuation? Lust?

Viktor didn't know what it was that Yuuri had awakened in him, he just knew that he desperately never wanted to let that feeling go.

Unfortunately, Yuuri slipped from his hands at the stroke of Midnight. The only thing he had to remember of him was the feeling of his lips on his and the scent of saltwater. It was awful of the universe to take away something so precious and bright. Yuuri was like a falling star, lighting up his world before he disappeared beyond some horizon and Viktor could not chase him because he was stranded in the dark landscape that was his life.

He didn't meet Yuuri until much later. It must've been fate, only something like fate would be so _cruel_ to Viktor.

This town was always strange, something unsettling had set into its early foundations and no amount of rain could ever wash it away. Viktor had remembered his father complaining that the locals were to close knit and he had secretly agreed with him, even the friends at school were aware of the clear divide. (He pretended he wasn't resentful but that was futile, he would always be a bit bitter about the loneliness he had faced growing up.)

He would learn much later why. This place was a haven for those who descended from the sea and Yuuri's family was just one of many trying to look for a peaceful existence. Once he learned the truth, the more obvious it had become.

As he had come to learn, the locals were.......special. (He'd learn much, much later as to why that was.)

Originally he had lived in this small sleepy town as a boy, it's the sleepy atmosphere and rustic architecture didn't suit his adventurous soul. He felt like he was caged here and when his parents had moved on, he had too. His parents had always liked it here more, his mother was as fond of the sea and his father liked the silence of the small rural town despite him complaining.

It was almost fitting that their gravestones were here too.

When he came back, he didn't expect much to change. Several shops had frequented had closed down, others had taken their place and he wasn't sure if he was supposed to mourn them or not. The town was very much the same, the town square had the same water fountain with the strange golden fish figure and the local church had its tall spires, even the local high school still looked like it had come out straight from a fairy tale. Townhall still looked gothic and imposing, something straight out of an Edgar Allen Poe poem with its stone walls and heavy wooden doors.

What surprised him the most was the local art museum. Apparently, there was an entire exhibit dedicated to him, displaying the painting that declared him a child prodigy, bright blue ribbon intact. He had remembered getting rid of those paintings, each one was too painful and he was at a point in his life where he wanted a clean break. Viktor had been twelve at the time when he had won an award for a contest hosted by the local art museum. He had entered on a whim, Viktor remembered that he didn't feel very confident going in. He had expected not to place, slightly envious of the high school students and their works of art.

The painting that had launched him into a local prodigy was that of his mother, sitting on the beach with her silver hair swaying in the wind. There was something soft about the picture, a type of innocence that made the middle-aged woman look youthful and sweet. Her blue eyes were glowing bright, a spark of happiness in her eyes that was immortalized forever by his own hands. Once he had pride in his work, now he looked at it with sorrow and a hint of regret that would never really go away.

Whatever the curators of this small and overlooked museum saw in his artwork escaped him. He couldn't resent the man who put these up no matter how he wanted to.

The bar his father requested was still in business and on days where his canvas stared at him blankly, he went to grab a drink and reminisce. It took the edge off for a little bit, dulling the sharper edges of his grief and pain.

Why was he even here? It was like sinking into an icy bath, all misery and no warmth.

There were a few changes but nothing too much. There was an inn that doubled as a hot spring. Yutopia Katsuki had been mentioned in the pamphlets and according to Viktor's short talk with the mayor over dinner, it was helping with tourism. He never had the chance to go, he always told himself he would. That chance would come much, much later.

That's a pity because he would've met Yuuri sooner if he did.

Instead, he found his Yuuri in the place where he stood now, the place where it all began----out by the edge of the docks, sketching the churning waters and fishing boats.

God, he was gorgeous. Viktor couldn't look away, his heart just squeezed inside his chest, wringing out the emotions he had hidden away since that party. Yuuri was nothing like the whirlwind of glitter and champagne who had stolen his breath away at that New Years party, his gilded edges were replaced with something more soft and mellow, like the curve of his cheeks and the gentle slope of his nose. Gone were the hal buttoned silk shirt and hazy eyes, all that was left was a young man who hunched over his work as if he were protecting it, his lips bitten red with worry and his hair adorably tousled by the breeze.

Viktor followed the movement of his hands, watching as the same hands that held him captured the beauty of this small washed out town. Graphite coated his fingertips, the sleeves of his white shirt had been pushed up to avoid being coated in a thin layer of graphite and charcoal.

To others, he was nothing more than another face on the street but to Viktor, he was a pool of endless possibilities.

He approached him cautiously, unsure of how to get his attention without sounding like an utter tool. Thankfully, it had been taken out of his hands.

The wind blew rambunctiously, snatching away the paper from his hands. Viktor dived at the same time Yuuri turned sharply to save his creation, both of their hands slapping down on the paper, pinning it to the boards before the wind and sea could lay waste to it.

Perhaps it was a mistake to look up but Viktor couldn't help but noticed how cold Yuuri's fingers were through his gloves and he so desperately wanted to talk to this man before he slipped away. It was the same pair of eyes that captured Viktor, clear of champagne, they widened behind blue rimmed glasses; they were full of life and Viktor was drowning in them.

Viktor crouched in front of Yuuri and offered him a sheepish smile, his cheeks now tinted pink.

"Hello, I'm Viktor."

 

 

Viktor had rituals that he followed to keep his mind from wandering too far. It was like a little map he had drawn for himself. He kept it close to his chest, tugging away from the wind.

He always found himself at the dock at exactly 11:11.

(Maybe it was a futile attempt at a wish? Did wishes have limits? He hoped not. Whatever deity was listening to him must've been sick of hearing from him.)

Waiting at the dock had become a pastime he wasn't so proud of. He wasn't sure what he was expecting, nothing would happen if he kept staring at the waves.

Nothing.

In the mornings where he felt restless, he found himself sitting at the edge of the dock. As he sat overlooking the sea and the lazy haze of fog that had settled in, Viktor sipped his tea. The taste awakens his senses bit by bit till he could feel some warmth buzzing in his chest like an angry bee. The sea was always beautiful, the snow just made it ethereal to look at. Sand and snow swirled together along the coastline, touching the waves and melting into the sand. The beauty was a finite one, only lasting as Mother Nature intended it to.

And he intended to capture it.

His fingers itched to paint the scene. Viktor was already putting together what he needed. There should be a canvas somewhere in the living roll that had been unused and another ticked away in his closet, small enough to fit between his shoes and scarves. Everything was there but his inspiration.

Being an artist was a cursed existence. Without inspiration, he was as good as dead. His muse wasn't here so Viktor had to fend for himself.

Naturally.

By the time he had gathered his easel and paints, the snow had stopped falling but the light remained ever so grey. It felt ominous, the wind was light too and to his surprise, he could hear the call of the seagulls.

He painted the entire canvas in a grey that felt like a reflection of himself, the more he looked at it the more he wanted to cover it up with something beautiful. So that's what he did. (Among other things.)

The sea was a strange greenish-blue, and today it looked dark and almost serene. The depths looked tempting, it's deceptively small waves eager to drown its next unsuspecting victim. Viktor wasn't a fool, he smiled as pressed his brush against the canvas, laying down smooth strokes before the paint dried.

The sea couldn't have him, he belonged to another.

 

 

He never told his fiance this but when he first saw Yuuri, the first thought in his mind was that he was the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes on.

The second thought was that he wanted to paint said beautiful creatures portrait.

Beautiful could be one way to describe Katsuki Yuuri but it was such a limiting word; Viktor prefered to use divine whenever the spoke about Yuuri, a miracle if he felt reverent and ethereal when he couldn't take his eyes off him. The dark-haired man could walk into the room and Viktors attention would instantly be on him, it was one of the many spells Yuuri had over him and he didn't want to break it. A kiss only cemented him further into the hole that was Katsuki Yuuri's love.

So was the affection of a selkie, gentle as a wave on a lazy summer's day. Viktor was sinking slowly into it.

Yuuri had always been the shy type, a bit reserved and he always had a wary look in his eyes when it came to people. Given what he was, it came with the territory. (Selkies were notoriously mistrustful. For good reason too.)

When Viktor broached the topic of doing his portrait, he had laughed and asked _'Who would ever want to paint a portrait of me?'_ To which Viktor replied in showing him exactly why the world deserved to have a portrait of him, thoroughly, detail by detail. Viktor pushed Yuuri onto this bed, worshipping his body with his lips and revelling in each breathy gasp that escaped past his kiss-bruised lips. He started with soft kisses before his teeth stained his skin. Viktor wasn't shy about leaving marks, especially on his neck. Call him possessive but he was an artist and the marks were beautiful against his skin.

Yuuri melted underneath him like cotton candy, his arms encircled around Viktor in a tight embrace as he moaned into his neck. Their lovemaking was slow and sweet, Viktor was adamant about trying to wring every drop of pleasure from his boyfriend. Of course, Viktor took his time. He loved taking his time when It came to Yuuri, his fingers itched to explore his skin.

Perhaps making love wasn't the best way to show why the love of your life should have his portrait done but Viktor was very good at persuading and Yuuri had given him his consent by the end, along with his heart.

Viktor considered it an early engagement present. Yuuri laughed at him breathlessly and kissed his forehead.

His first portrait of Yuuri had been of him sitting in their room with a soft green blanket thrown over his shoulder, arms folded underneath and face turned towards Viktor. Yuuri's hair was a mess but artfully so, mussed from Viktor running his hands through the soft strands of raven. Underneath he was very much naked, mostly at Viktors insistence and because of their most recent bout of lovemaking.

Yuuri looked amused, almost. So utterly perfect. Painting was such a sweet, sweet torture.

He wanted to kiss him, bruising those reddened lips and swallow his gasps but he refrained and picked up a canvas and started to sketch. It almost saddened him that this portrait would never be seen by the public but this was his and Yuuri's alone.

Viktor had carefully omitted the love bites per his fiancé's request but he could imagine the soft hues of green and blue and red smattered across his collarbone and neck, dipping well below the soft blankets. He repressed a shudder as he thought of those marks--- the way his mouth planted such colours till Yuuri's skin bloomed like wildflowers, the way Yuuri begged him for more, the way his hands left bruises on his hips. Viktor caught the innocent flutter of Yuuri's eyelashes, the young man held himself like a man who knew exactly what he was doing and Viktor cursed himself (or rather he congratulated himself) for creating a monster. Painting was indeed such a sweet, sweet story.

He smiled and continued, knowing that Yuuri loved breaking his composure.

Yuuri's neck was long and pale, it was perfect for kissing and even more perfect for biting. Viktors lips were always drawn to the smooth patch of skin hence why the rather egregious number of marks. (Maybe he enjoyed it too much but if only this man could see just how beautiful he was, he was irresistible!. Could you really blame Viktor? Such a beautiful creature was his and every instinct told him to keep him all to himself.)

It was the eyes that Viktor had enjoyed the most, there was so much that Viktor could fit into those eyes. The soft brown of his irises sparkled That morning, especially when he looked at him which such a soft and vulnerable look. Viktor had been brought to his knees by those very eyes/

He couldn't think of any other word to describe Yuuri, all he could think about was the ring that hung from his neck and the way he smiled at him. A promise, born of gold and love——everything that Viktor had dreamed of.

"Is that how you see me?" Yuuri asked him over dinner.

The portrait laid flat in their living room, the paint still drying. It had taken Viktor several hours and plenty of apologizing as he rubbed Yuuri's stiff muscles but it had been worth it. He thought of hanging it in their bedroom.

Viktor quirked his lips. "Like what, darling?"

"Like that?" He twirled his pasta halfheartedly, hesitant to meet his eyes. Viktor stays silent hoping for him to continue. (His heart skipped a beat, afraid that Yuuri wasn't satisfied with it.) "I don't look that... beautiful, Viktor."

He breathed out a sigh of relief. Viktor wanted to kiss him senseless but he refrained, now was not the time. His fiance needed him.

"Oh, Yuuri." Viktor leaned over the table, wiping some sauce from the corner of his mouth before leaning in to kiss that spot. "You are. Even if you don't feel like it, you are. Yuuri, you're beautiful to me."

"You're biased."

Viktor took his hand in his. "Maybe so but you are gorgeous and you make me happy. You have no idea how absolutely amazing you are. I could paint for a thousand years and I couldn't capture even a fraction of your beauty on my canvases. You could bring men down to their knees with one look, you could command entire armies with just your smile alone, and my god, let me tell you about your nose because I am absolutely gone for-----"

"Okay! Okay, I get it, Vitya." His cheeks turned pink.

"No, Yuuri. You don't understand," Viktor said with a serious expression. "Your thighs are a work of art and I don't mind being crushed between them at all. And let me tell you about your stomach because it's honestly the most adorable thing and I just love squishing it. And....And your ass is just-----"

To his credit, Yuuri smiles. It's tiny and buried underneath his self-doubt but it's there. It's enough.

"See," Viktor tells him with a kiss to his forehead. " _Beautiful._ My beautiful Yuuri."

Yuuri looks at him as if he doesn't believe him and that's okay. One day he will but for now, Viktor will believe for the both of them.

"You're ridiculous." He said but there was no cynicism behind his words.

"I adore you."

"As do I, Viktor."

Viktor names series of portraits aptly: _Life and Love._

It had been a successful collection that season. Even Yakov agreed and it was damn near impossible to earn Yakov's approval. He considered it the height of his career as an artist and one day he hoped he could do more.

But the fame and the recognition and the awards compared nothing next to the real thing.

He had a gold ring in his finger to prove that.

And so did Yuuri.

 

 

 

 

 

_11:11_

It is to make another wish.

He's lost count of how many wishes he sent out into the cosmos. There hasn't been an answer and he can only hope.

It's night and the wind is bitter, nipping at his exposed fingertips as he stood at the edge of the dock. From a distance he can hear Makkachin behind him, her nails clicking against the wooden boards as she anxiously waits for him

"Happy Birthday, my love." He whispered to the dark waters.

In his hand was an empty bottle with a rolled up message inside its glassy confines. Viktor raised it up to his lips and kissed it, hoping that there would a day he wouldn't have to kiss glass bottles to get his love across to his beloved. It had been close to a year and he was desperate, old legends told him of glass bottles with messages and with whatever hope he had, he gave it a try. Viktor didn't cope well with ghosts. He reeled his arm back and threw the glass bottle as hard as he could, hoping that it would cross the sea and be delivered to where he needed it to go.

The moon had hidden its face away tonight. He could not see the glass bottle, he could only hear the sound of it as hit the water.

Makkachin stuck her nose over the edge of the dock, sniffing tentatively and whining. The waters were black and Viktor tried not to think about what lurked below, he no longer had Yuuri to protect him. She whined and pressed herself close to Viktor as the breeze picked up. There would a rainstorm tonight. He could feel the breeze as it swept across the waves and crashed against the pillar of his body.

"Let's go, girl," Viktor said softly, peeling himself away from the edge of the water. "Makka?" His companion stayed still, her eyes trained on something he couldn't see. The poodles sniffed the air, her nose pointed toward the ground. After a while she huffed and trotted back to Viktor, he tail wagging slowly. Viktor raised an eyebrow as she brushed past him and settled in front of the fireplace, he dismissed it. It's not the strangest thing he's seen and Viktor has seen a lot of strange things in this town but he lets it go.

He glanced behind him one last time but all he can see is darkness. The sea gave him nothing, refusing to give up its secrets.

 _'Fine then,'_ He thought, closing the door with more force than necessary, _'I'll wait. I can be patient. Keep your secrets, just give me what's mine.'_

 

 

 

Their first date wasn't quite a disaster.

Dating wasn't really his thing. (A series of one night stands didn't quite count either.) Viktor was at a loss and it showed. He was nervous, fidgeting with Makkachin's leash as Yuuri stuffed his hands in his pockets. Both of them were enjoying the silence and Viktor was too flighty to break it, Yuuri smiled shyly as he picked up a broken seashell and his heart plunged down into his feet. It was at the moment, Viktor knew there was no going back for him. He never quite understood his own stance at love, either it was real or not, but when Yuuri laughed at his stupid jokes and reached out to hold his gloved hand, he thought that love was something he wouldn't have minded learning about.

Yuuri Katsuki was nothing like the man who had swept him off his feet that night, he was soft spoken and very sweet. That was okay, more than okay really. Viktor liked surprises and Yuuri was his to discover.

Viktor had sketched Yuuri whenever he thought about him, the strong sharp jawline and the soft curve of his lips were familiar to him to a point where he could sketch them in his sleep. (He would never tell Yuuri that he had ended up filling an entire sketchbook with just him. Or the three canvases he hid underneath his bed or the many numbers of napkins that had Yuuri's eyes on them. He'd rather step into the ocean and drown than admit it. Chris had made fun of him in his early months of pining and he'd never let Viktor live it down. ) Yuuri was better than the mysterious and suave playboy Viktor had thought of him as. The more he looked at Yuuri, the more he realized that the man from that night and the man holding his hand were the same people.

Maybe the quiet wasn't too bad. Viktor was learning to enjoy it. Yuuri and he stood in the sand, watching the waves as Makkachin raced after the seagulls.

"Are you cold?" Viktor asked as Yuuri shivered when a particularly strong gust of wind whipped past them. "I could give you my jacket?" He offered.

"N-No?" Yuuri shook his head and leaned in closer to Viktor's side, his hand brushing against his. His cheeks are tinged pink and Viktor has the sudden urge to squish his cheeks between the palms of his hand. "Won't you be cold too?"

Words. Words were a thing. Viktor didn't remember how to use his words at the moments so he kept his mouth shut and smiled.

Walking down the beach had turned out to be a bad idea as it started to rain and whatever deity Viktor had pissed off had it out for him because he didn't even have time to get a damn kiss in. They had stood there for a grand total of thirty seconds before they were soaked, Makkachin ran in excited circles around them and barked at the offending rainclouds.

Viktor had grabbed Yuuri's hand and made a mad dash to the safety of his porch where they took some shelter. He had shrugged off his own jacket, fighting back a shiver and draped it around Yuuri's shoulders. It probably didn't help with the cold but Viktor couldn't stand to see Yuuri shivering on his doorstep.

He turned to Yuuri, his voice refusing to work. "Um....w-would you like to....." Viktor gestured his door, stammering as Yuuri stared back at him with wide eyes. His cheeks turned red incredibly fast. "Inside is much warmer than....this."

"Oh?" Yuuri smiled and took his hand, effectively shutting Viktor up. "I'd love to."

Makkachin raced through the door, dripping water as she went. He winced knowing that he would have to clean that up later, Viktor was soaked to the bones and he desperately needed to change unless he wanted to catch a cold. Yuuri shrugged off his jacket and then his own hoodie, holding them uncertainty in his arms.

"Do you want to change?" Viktor asked, toeing off his shoes. "I could lend you some of my clothes while we waited for yours to dry?"

Yuuri ran a hand through his hair, pushing the wet strands of hair back. Viktor tried to keep his eyes on his face. It didn't help matters that Yuuri's white tee shirt was sticking to his body, highlighting his muscles extremely well. Unfair. "I-Is that okay?"

"Yes," Viktor said, quickly looking away. He felt the heat rise in his cheeks fast, at this rate he was fairly certain there was steam coming out of his ears. He didn't know why he was getting so flustered over this man. Viktor didn't do flustered. _Get it together. You're Viktor fucking Nikiforov, not a teenage boy._ "L-Let me get you a towel first and something that fits."

He grabbed two towels, one blue and the other pink, and then some sweats. Viktor tried his best not to think about Yuuri in his clothes as he raced back downstairs to where Yuuri waited in the foyer. "Ah....sorry," He said, draping a towel over Yuuri's head. "I suppose I should've checked the weather before picking you up."

"No, it's okay." Yuuri peeked up from underneath towel, brown eyes sparkling softly.

(So cute, so unfair!)

Viktor bit his lip, nobody should look this good after running through the rain. Rivulets of water ran down his face, sloping off his nose and clinging to his soft cheeks. Yuuri looked up at him with a shy, bashful smile and if Viktor wasn't dead yet he would be soon. He was adorable, absolutely lovely and every wet dream rolled up into flesh and blood----Viktors poor heart wasn't going to make it through the rest of the day without skipping a beat. (If Yuuri fluttered his eyes at him one more time, he was certain his heart would give out.)

"I had a lot of fun, Viktor." He said, blushing softly.

"I did too," Viktor said, resisting the urge to kiss him. It wouldn't be too hard, all he had to do was lean in and press his lips against Yuuri's. God, it was so tempting. He put those thoughts away and dropped his hands. "I want to do this again."

Yuuri laughed, "Running through the rain?"

"No, but I wouldn't mind running through the rain if it was with you." _Smooth, Nikiforov. Very smooth._ "However, I was hoping we could go on another date. This time without getting caught in the rain."

"I'd like that. Can I chose the place this time?"

Viktor had to really resist the urge to kiss him, it was possibly the most difficult thing he's ever done. Yuuri's face was a soft shade of pink and the colour that suited him nicely. He nodded and squeezed his hand. "Why not?"

"That's good," Yuuri said, squeezing back. "Have you ever tried Katsudon before?"

He shook his head. "No?"

"Would you like to try it?"

 

 

Yutopia Katsuki was the only inn in this small town that had hot springs. Viktor hadn't been here for quite some time. Despite living only twenty minutes away, he couldn't bring himself to come back. Yuuri had brought him here for their second date and Viktor officially met his parents for the first time over a warm bowl of Katsudon.

He could smell the scent of cigarettes as he approached the front desk. A woman in her late twenties flipped through a magazine, her expression bored. Viktor could see the similarities between the two siblings, the shared button nose and the familiar shape of their eyes. He noted how tired she looked, underneath her eyes were the same circles that decorated his own face. "If you're here for the hot springs, they're cleaning them at the moment but if you want some food, it'll take about an hour," She said, without looking up. "I hope you have the patience of a saint."

"I don't mind waiting."

"Viktor?" Mari Katsuki looked up from her magazine, her eyes narrowing at the sight of him. He supposed he deserved that. She didn't say a word as she took in his appearance and he didn't blame her. He looked like shit. "Took you long enough. Where have the hell have you been?"

"Sorry for not coming earlier," Viktor winced at how his words sounded like an excuse, he swallowed down his guilt before it choked him. "Where's Akko?"

"She's visiting her parents." Mari waved her hand. "Don't worry about it, kid. You're here now. That's all that matters."

He managed to smile. "I swear I'm not a hermit, it's just that......" He shuffled from foot to foot, bracing himself against the desk. Viktor sighed heavily, there was no point in stalling, it was best to just rip the bandaid off. "Have you heard anything from him?" Viktor asked, daring to hope.

"You know he doesn't speak to us, Viktor. /especially when he's out there, nobody does." She cupped his shoulder, squeezing gently. Mari gave him a look of pity that was well deserved. He sighed yet again and lowered his head, his shoulders going slack. "It's not your fault, you know? It's just how we selkies are, falling in love is difficult for our kind and Yuuri understood the consequences. We're torn between the sea and our lovers, it's just how we are. Not once did he regret his choices, he knew what he wanted."

Viktor huffed. "I know. When will he come back?"

She pursed her lips. "It's hard to tell. They say that the first time one of us falls in love, we disappear into the ocean for days. Sometimes it's months and if your especially unlucky, it's years but we always come back."

He bit his lip, his eyes flashing to the framed picture of the Katsuki family. Between Mari and Yuuri stood a girl with dyed blonde hair. Viktor had met Akko after she had married Mari, that was when he had just started to date Yuuri. He remembered a short woman with waifish looks and big dark brown eyes. She was human, unlike her girlfriend. "Yuuri said you were gone for a month. It wasn't for your honeymoon, was it?"

"Ah. I'm surprised you remembered that." Mari rolled her eyes and muttered brat underneath her breath. Viktor knew she didn't mean it but he never really had siblings. "Akko wasn't happy that I had to leave so soon. I was told that I left for a month but honestly, it felt like an eternity to me---stuck, torn between the person you love and your love with the sea. You have to choose, it's the most difficult decision I ever had to make."

And how? "It's already close to a year."

"I know. I miss him too." Mari stepped out from behind the counter and led him into the restaurant that was mostly empty. "We all do but you just got to hold on. It's hard to resist the ocean but I'm sure Yuuri's love for you is enough to overcome that pull. He's my brother. If I was able to overcome it, so will he. It's just a matter of time, kid. Have some faith."

"Does he not love me enough?" He asked. "Or did I not love him enough?"

"It's not about you, Viktor." She said, reaching into her apron for a pen. Mari wrote down something, the pen cap in her mouth. "As I said before, it's a selkie thing."

Two other people were seated towards the windows with their meals but they were focused on the soccer match on the screen. Viktor felt his stomach rumble at the smell of food, Hiroko must've been cooking. She always did have a sixth sense when it came to Viktor, or maybe it was just mothers intuition. He felt the guilt bubble back up, he should've come and visited instead of moping in his cottage.

"Is she mad at me?" Viktor asked sheepishly. "She told me to stay close, I haven't been doing that at all."

"Mom? Nah." Mari shrugged, sitting on the opposite side of the table. She propped her legs up on an empty chair. "She's worried though, and she asks about you a lot. I don't know what to tell her."

"I'm okay?"

" _Sure._ " The elder Katsuki sibling looked like she needed a cigarette. "And I'm a pretty little mermaid." Viktor cracks a small smile at the image and shrugged on his jacket.

"You're the farthest thing from a mermaid. Yuuri said mermaids are too whimsical for their own good."

"Did he now?" Viktor shrugged, humming a response. "Dad will be done soon. Are you going to stay for dinner or do we have to drag you from your hermit shack?"

His jacket was on halfway before he stopped. "I didn't know I was allowed."

She rolls her eyes. "You're family."

 

 

Viktor watched with held breath as Yuuri picked up a picture of his parents. The younger man was silent, staring at the picture as if there was some secret he was trying to unlock.

The better part of their afternoon had been spent napping and fooling around. Viktor had suggested tea while Yuuri was left to his own devices.

If Yuuri noticed the lack of pictures of his parents, he didn't say anything. His mantle hosted an array of small knick-knacks from his travels and an old clock that no longer worked, it's hands forever stuck on 11:11. There was only one other picture and that was of him, Lilia, and Yokov when he graduated from college. Yuri didn't want to be in the picture at all, he only grumbled as Viktor pushed the camera into his hand. (He eventually got his picture with the fiery blond, after bribing him with free food. He still had it in his wallet.)

Viktor never really had a home. Looking around the living room of his cottage, he could tell that there wasn't anything homely about it. He never really stuck around long enough settle and the lingering ghosts of his parents, forever trapped in their happiness, made it more of a home than he ever did.

He turned to Viktor with questioning eyes. "Are these---"

"My parents, yes." Viktor smiled, putting down the packets of tea. He walked over and sat down next to Yuuri on the couch, tracing his fingertips along the edges of the picture frame. "I believe I was ten in this one. My hair was longer then."

They had been dating for almost six months at this point and Viktor had avoided talking about his parents. He wasn't sure if he could bring them up without crying. Viktor tried not to remember the night when his parents died but it was futile, the memory wasn't fresh. It was hazy and he could only remember the feeling of his whole world shattering. He remembers the officer at his door, the smell of the hospital, the feeling of Yakov's hand around his small shoulders; the funeral was a blur to him, and if God was trying to spite him, he recalled how it rained as soon as everyone left.

An accident they said, they simply lost control on a cold night. They said it could happen to anyone, ice was hard to see at night and just because your tires had chains, it didn't mean they would always work.

Now it seemed that he had no other choice but to revisit his past. He just wanted to rip out ever secret carved into his heart and place it at Yuuri's feet. Viktor needed to do this, there were things about him that Yuuri needed to know. Yuuri trusted him with his biggest secret, Viktor could do the same with his scars.

Yuuri leaned against his shoulder, his hair tickling his neck. He smelled like Viktor's shampoo. "You look like your mother."

"That's what my father told me." He smiled ruefully. "I think he was happy that I looked nothing like him, he never liked his appearance and he always said that my mother was the most beautiful women he had ever met."

"You have her smile."

"You think so?" Viktor asked softly.

"Yeah," Yuuri said, turning his head to kiss his neck. His lips were warm against his skin. "But you also have your father's eyes, the same shade of blue."

The picture frame was old, the corners were coming undone and he really ought to find a new one. His mother and father stared back at him, he could feel the questions burning in their silent stares. They would be asking him if he was happy? Did he eat enough? Has he found someone yet? Most would scoff and roll their eyes but Viktor lowered his head.

_Am I happy?_

He didn't know the answer to that but he was learning. Happiness came in bits and pieces and he was still learning how to assemble, there was no set of instructions or a guide, only a vague understanding of what it meant to be happy. (His mother would scowl at that, and then she would say that Viktor was better than this.)

_I don't eat enough as I should. Lilia tells me that I'm too thin._

He'd work on that. His appetite was nothing like Yuuri's but Hiriko was adamant about making sure that Viktor ate enough when he visited Yutopia.

 _I think I found someone_ , he thought as he turned his head to look at Yuuri. Viktor laid his head on top of his and closed his eyes. Yuuri's embrace was warm as his arms wrapped around Viktor. He was comforting him, silently as he knew how. It just made Viktor love him even more and he hoped that this man would be his.....one day. _I found someone who's like me but just doesn't know it yet. I love him more than anything. I didn't know you could love a person this much?_

"I suppose I do?"

"I wished I could've met them," Yuuri said. He took the picture frame from his hands.

Viktor wasn't the type to make hopeless wishes, and yet......

"What would you say to them, darling?"

Yuuri said, almost too casually. "I would've thanked them for bringing you in the world and...... then I would ask them for their blessing to marry their only son."

Viktor ended up shattering a teacup when he registered his words a full hour later.

 

 

For three is nights in a row, Viktor found himself at the dock.

His tea had gone cold, he had barely sipped it. He had hoped that some fresh air and cup of tea would settle his mind but no such luck. Viktor was stuck and he only had to blame himself. Makkachin was inside, settled in her bed near the fireplace. He missed her presence.

Viktor tugged the blanket around his body and stood up.

If he slept, he would dream of Yuuri. Some days, he would miss him so terribly that it would steal his breath away and on others, it was a dull ache that hammered at his chest. It was torture and he knew he couldn't keep going on like this. If Yuuri was here, he'd tug him into bed and tell him everything is okay.

But he wasn't here.

"Oh, Yuuri." Viktor felt the sting of tears and he couldn't stop them. "Where are you, my love??

He turned away, not allowing his tears to fall into the sea. The sea had taken so much away from him, he wouldn't let it take anymore. It was easy to turn his back until.....

"Vitya?"

Viktor spun around so fast that he nearly lost his footing on the ice-slicked boards. The lamp hit on the posts as he brought it up, hoping that this wasn't a cruel illusion his lonely brain had conjured up.

"Y-Yuuri?"

Dripping wet and naked, he was a vision to Viktors sore eyes. Yuuri stood before him, pale as the moon and just a radiant despite being in the ocean for the better half of the year. Viktor wanted to sink to his knees and beg for him to never ever leave, his heart hammered in his chest but his feet remained planted.

"Hello, Vitya." He said, managing to smile a little. "I hope I'm not too late........"

Yuuri looked at him with wide eyes as he trembled, a particularly nasty gust of wind making him tremble. His sealskin barely covering his modesty, it's not exactly meant to be used as a coat on land.

"Are you angry with me?"

"Never!" Viktor gasped, throwing his blanket around his slender shoulders and trapping Yuuri in a bone-crushing hug. He never wants to let go of this man, ever. Once nearly destroyed him. He'd rather carve out his own heart than watch Yuuri disappear into the ocean again. "You.....You were right on time, my darling. H-happy Anniversary, my love."

He kissed him through the tears, stealing Yuuri's breath away and keeping him close. Yuuri clutched him like he was his lifeline, his skin was cold but his lips were warm.

Yuuri was back. He was here, right here in his arms.

"You're back. Oh god, you're finally back," Viktor said and pulled away, smattering kisses all over his face. "Stay. Please, darling. Never leave me."

"I'm sorry," Yuuri kept repeating, his eyes fluttering closed as tears escaped his eyes. "I'm so sorry, Vitya."

He finally kissed Yuuri, a year full of longing and love bleeding through his lips and settling on the tip of his tongue. His lips were cold as they against his, Yuuri's fingers were cold and bony, trembling as he clutched Viktor. Viktor wasn't sure if the taste of salt was from his own tears or the taste of the sea that lingered. Kissing Yuuri was like coming home, everything felt right as their lips slotted together. He felt a sort of completion as Yuuri's lips warmed underneath his, like winter melting into spring, bringing life and colour that Viktor had desperately missed.

Yuuri pulled away, the water refracting off his face. "I—-I didn't mean to leave. You have to believe me, I never meant to leave. I....oh god, Viktor! I'm sorry I'm so, so sorry. Viktor, please—-"

Viktor kisses him again and again and again. He felt like he was being swallowed up by the darkness that consumed him, Yuuri was the white haze at the very end of the tunnel and Viktor was bathing in his light. His sun, his reason to love, his everything—-he never wanted to forget the way Yuuri felt wrapped around him.

" _Stay_ ," Viktor begged as they separated with a wet sound. His fingers tangled in his dark hair, clutching him close. "Stay by my side and never leave."

Yuuri looked so pale, his skin hugged his bones and there was no flush in his cheeks. The pain was clear, raw and broken in his dark eyes; he had suffered too and Viktor would never know about it. Viktor was a reflection of him, blue against brown. Both had suffered as they waited for each other. No more, this was enough. Viktor had proven himself to the sea, Yuuri was his to love and cherish to the end of his life.

This was enough, he could never ever ask for more than this.

This was enough.

"I am, I will, Vitya. I'm never leaving you again." Yuuri kissed him, desperate and hungry. "Never again, Vitya. Never. Swear it to me, love."

"I swear," Viktor said against his lips. "I swear, my darling. Never again."

When Viktor kisses Yuuri, he promised himself to be happy. When Yuuri kisses him back, he promises to stay close to him.

That's all he wants.

That's all he'll ever need.

 

 

When Viktor learned Yuuri's secret, his entire world didn't shatter as he expected it to.

There was confusion, obviously but there was also a sense of relief that destroyed every anxious thought in his mind. There were also question, lots and lots of questions. Most importantly.......

"Yuuri?" He took a step towards his boyfriend. Yuuri flinched back and that hurt more than anything. Viktor buries his pain and extends his hand slowly. "Are you okay, love?"

"Am I—what?" Yuuri looked away from him, hiding his panic-filled eyes. "I—I'm sorry."

Yuuri clutched his sealskin close to his body that very morning, diving underneath the waves with a hasty apology before Viktor could stop him. He was shocked to say the least, not quite believing the fact that his boyfriend had turned into a seal in front of his eyes. Viktor had remained at the edge of the dock for a solid ten minutes, replaying the images in his head before he started to rationalize.

It took him two minutes to realize that logic couldn't explain what he saw and another minute for him to understand that his boyfriend probably didn't want to be bothered.

He found himself in his home, in their bedroom. Viktor felt like his was walking through a dream as he sat down on their bed. Just this morning Yuuri had woken up and wrapped himself around Viktor, now all he could feel was a Yuuri sized hole.

And so he could do one thing.....Wait. Wait and research. He picked up his laptop and started to research. His mind needed to come down from the clouds before he too floated up, this was the best way to keep him grounded to reality.

Viktor didn't even notice as the sun rose and fell, he didn't notice the way Makkachin sat close to the door and he didn't notice the moon lighting up the beach.

Viktor noticed the silence as he fell asleep that night, the bed was too empty and the cold found him easily. Yuuri liked to curl up when he slept, tucking himself against Viktors. He missed having the younger man in his arms, he missed his warmth and the sound of his snores. It was like having his limbs cut off, all he had was phantom pain and his own thoughts that were too loud for comfort.

Makkachin slept at the foot of the bed, facing towards the door in case Yuuri decided to come back.

It was late at night during the early hours of the morning when Yuuri crept back, his bare feet padding across the floor. Viktor could feel the bed dip, the smell of salt and sea breeze followed Yuuri, it seemed to stick to his skin and Viktor wondered if he would get used to this. He didn't know what to do when Yuuri laid down.

"Vitya....." Yuuri called out his name tentatively. "Vitya, are you awake?"

He opened his eyes and turned till he laid on his side, staring straight into Yuuri's dark brown eyes. "You're back," Viktor murmured, lifting up his hand to cup his cheeks. He felt relief ebb away at his worry, Yuuri was home and he was safe. For now, that was all that mattered to him. "You came back to me. I was so worried, I didn't know what to do."

Yuuri's eyes were swollen, his eyes were tinged red and Viktor wanted to soothe whatever worries that he suffered from. There were worse things, he said to himself.

He's lived through worse.

He can live through this.

His world didn't shatter, it merely shifted focus and he was forced to see it through a new lens.

"V-Viktor! I'm so sorry." Yuuri's voice trembled, he was barely held together. The dark haired man flinched when Viktor touched him. "I....I don't know what to do. I messed up, didn't I? I messed up. I......."

"Shh. Yuuri, it's okay." Viktor kissed him, a soft peck to his forehead that Yuuri sank into his embrace. His hands were trembling as they wrapped around his neck. "Relax, darling. Take a deep breath in for me and let it out. It's okay, you're okay." Viktor talked him through it in a soft hushed voice, his hands rubbing circles into his back till he sank into his embrace. Yuuri felt like a furnace, his skin was hot to the touch and Viktor wrapped the blankets around them tightly. "I'm right here, I'm not going to leave. Okay?"

Yuuri kept apologizing between his frantic breaths. "I'm sorry."

"None of that, Yuuri. There's nothing for you to apologize for." Viktor thought about kissing him, like all the other times. For now, he didn't. "In the morning, darling. You can tell me everything then."

"But---"

"I'm not mad." Yuuri's shoulders relaxed slightly when Viktor said that. "I have questions, so many questions."

"Everything, Viktor. I'll tell you everything. I promise."

"I know." Viktor held him close and closed his eyes. Yuuri felt so small in his arms like the sea had taken something from him, leaving him only this. Whatever this was, Viktor was still trying to make sense of it. "Sleep for now. You must be tired."

Yuuri continues. "I don't want you to hate me."

"Never, Yuuri."

"You're disgusted by me," The younger man sniffled into his shoulder. He could feel Yuuri's shoulder shake under his hands. "You must hate me for keeping this from you."

"I'm _not_ , my love." He insisted. He sighs, opening his eyes. "I am not disgusted, I could never be. Nor could I be mad at you."

Viktor surprised himself by how well he was handling this. He had spent hours on his laptop reading and researching, at first he had no idea what he was looking for. Typing in 'seal people' didn't really narrow down his search. Somehow he found his way to stories about seals turning into humans and shedding their skins, and then something about leaving their spurred lovers which lead to tales about fish wives and so on......to say the least, he was still confused but at least he had somewhat of an understanding of what Yuuri was.

"There are worse ways to find out. I know it's not ideal but at least I know."

(A selkie, now that was something he didn't expect at all.)

Yuuri looked up with a pained expression, tears pouring from his eyes. It broke Viktor's heart to see him like this. "V-Viktor, I'm not human."

"That's....." Viktor tightened his arms around him. Yuuri needed an anchor. "That's okay with me. Trust me, I'm not exactly complaining."

Yuuri's lips twist into a grimace of sorts. "You should be."

"Yuuri?" His eyebrows quirked up. "Do you want me to be bothered by it?"

"You should be," He repeated again.

"I'm not. I'm honestly not." Viktor said quickly. _Now's not the time for your stubbornness, Yuuri._ "I'm not scared of you. I'm not disgusted by you. I'm certainly not complaining about you. All I have are questions, nothing more and nothing less. I still love you. You're still my Yuuri, seal or not, I love you."

Yuuri narrowed his eyes. "Most humans would run away from me."

"Well lucky for you," Viktor chuckled, pressing Yuuri's head against his shoulder. "I'm not _most _humans, Yuuri. I'm Viktor. I'm your Vitya. It's gonna take a hell of a lot to make me run from you."__

__"Really?" He kisses his hair, allowing Yuuri to curl around him. "You would still marry me? Even after all of this?"_ _

__"Yes." Viktor replied swiftly, closing his eyes, "As I said, I love you. Seal or not."_ _

**Author's Note:**

> This might be my last post for a while, school is kicking my bat atm but hopefully, I'll be back.  
> kudos or comment if you liked this and I hope to be back as soon as I can!  
> <3 <3 <3


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